“Love is our birthright. Love is the fundamental necessity of our life. Do not go seeking for that which you are. Those who go seeking for love only make manifest their own lovelessness and the loveless never find love. Only the loving find love and they never have to seek for it.”― Neville Goddard
In my mid-twenties, I left the church to find God. I was a pastor who was guided by an ambition to become something and not to honor the purpose of my life. I wanted to have a big congregation, speak on large platforms, and be celebrated for my charisma, passion, and intellect. Like most people who go after titles, fame, and fortune with no deeper meaning, I became lost.
This may make a lot of church leaders cringe, but leaving the church was the best decision of my life. People in the church had an expectation of me to live up to a certain standard. It should have been expected since I was the pastor. However, the same expectation was on me when I was a member of the choir, a young minister, and an ordained elder.
Each day, I was living my life as a performance to ensure the people loved me and accepted me. One wrong move and they may disown me for my mistakes and “sins”. I wasn’t alone in my acting though. The single mother that came in for counseling was struggling with the balance of finding a man and keeping her integrity. The usher was keeping a calm face but was facing mental and physical abuse in her home. The deacon always wore the best suits but carried the worst secrets.
Everyone was acting. Leaving the church gave my definition of love the freedom to expand. Without the expectations of people, I discovered that love didn’t have to be earned. Unconditional love didn’t have to be rare and it didn’t have to mean obligation. I started to believe that maybe love wasn’t that hard.
Getting Off The Stage
It’s taken years to get my arms around that concept. I was living like I was on stage, living for the amusement of others. Today, I have come to fully understand that love isn’t about hustling or acting. It’s not a stage but a journey, a love journey, meant to be traveled with the skill of kids searching for Easter eggs. It isn’t something that is hard or narrow or obligatory. Love is acceptance, allowing, and being. Love is keeping the purest form of yourself.
I know that love is in the ordinary of everyday living. Love is seen in the side-by-side companionship of acceptance. Love is in the simple art of creating a life that is breathable and supportive. It’s not only seen on Valentine’s day and Christmas. Love is boundless and endless. And you get to choose love. Each and every moment. You don’t have to wait for it to choose you. No, Lover of Life, Love chose you from the moment you were born.
So you deserve love, most of all from yourself. Stop overthinking and criticizing every little thing that you do. Stop finding blame with yourself, like you are some monster that needs to be fixed. You deserve happiness, peace, and prosperity. And no matter what you have tricked yourself into believing, you are deserving of love. It is your birthright.
I deserve love. I am a beautiful creation and a valuable treasure. I am a masterpiece. I deserve love. I was born to be loved. I accept my birthright of love, to exist as I am. My flaws have beauty, my scars are precious. I am lovable just as I am.