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Dating Confessions Vol. 9: I’m Too Independent

Dating Confessions Vol. 9: I’m Too Independent

By: Sebastien “@TheGayBestie” Gaudin


Time and time again we’ve all sang along to hit records like, Destiny’s Child’s “Independent Women” or Ne-Yo’s “Miss Independent” belting out the importance of sustaining our own. For most of us we’re highly familiar with, “The shoes on my feet, I bought it. The clothes I’m wearing, I bought it. The rock I’m rocking, I bought it”, but when does all that independence become too much?


 Beyonce, Kelly Rowland, Michelle Williams

Again I’m guilty of thinking the same as my female counterparts believing I don’t need a man for anything, which is true. Honestly, I want a man that can and wants to. As said before (in past post) men pride themselves on providing, so it’s imperative to have someone that can either match or surpass your level. Over the years we’ve been programmed to think that these hit songs tell us how we should run our lives. Yes, its great to say, “I depend on me”, but it’s just as important to allow someone to do for you too.



After constantly dubbed as “Miranda” amongst numerous groups of friends I’ve seen my own truth through their eyes. Subconsciously, I was the one burying myself into my work to avoid feeling anything for another person. Some of you can relate to numbing your feelings with accomplishments to fill the void of another person. Spending late nights pushing towards dreams and aspirations because it was in your control. I’m far too familiar with those nights myself until entering my current relationship.

One notable night I’ll never forget when my boyfriend stated, “You act like you don’t need me.” I never forgot when those words echoed through my spirit as I winced to catch my breath. I had never thought my need to provide for myself was potentially pushing away the man the meant the most to me outside my family. Talk about a much needed reality check. He made me realize that it was okay to allow someone else to do for me, which at the end of the day was what I really wanted.



So to my independent, motivated, money making ladies its okay for him to swoop in and save the day from time to time. Learn to place your own pride and ego aside to allow him to show off just a little. There is no harm or weakness by allowing yourself to depend on your man or guy. When all is said in done he really wants to; if he doesn’t then we need to talk. Until next time, “Throw your hands up at me!”



About The Writer:


As a New Jersey native it came as no surprise when Sebastien, birthed a knack for l talking and writing. During his college days the young blogger gained experience through international talkers such as The Maury Show and The Mo’nique Show. After years of interning and assisting the aspiring journalist threw caution to the wind and launched The Gay Bestie, LLC.  


The lifestyle and culture company provides a different spin on love, sex, relationships, and fashion.  #TGB focuses on the 21st Century woman and her loyal companion, other known as the gay bestie. Readers will find discussions that are usually held behind closed doors placed in the forefront to totally meet the needs of all. No, topic is ever off limits.


So ladies brace yourselves because Sebastien is taking you places where you’ll be sure to blush and share a laugh! He’s giving exactly what’s been missing. Grab you’re favorite beverage (i.e. red wine), sit back, and prepare to gab about this with your girlfriends the minute you see them.


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