So I think I’ve met the right woman for me, but I don’t know if she thinks I’m the right man for her. It’s not that she doesn’t like me or doesn’t find me attractive; she’s just apprehensive and still dealing with emotional baggage from previous relationships. From what I’ve gathered from her, her family, and her friends; all of her exes either cheated on her, cheated on her and beat her, beat her and stole from her, or cheated and stole from her. So I try to be patient and find myself constantly trying to prove I’m a good guy. She rarely allows me to do even the most chivalrous things like open the door, pay for our date, or pull her chair out for her. The other day when we were hanging with friends–sort of like a couples’ game night–we had to do this trust fall exercise. It was like pulling teeth getting to her to even attempt it. Once she did, she cried and left. I felt bad for putting her in that position and now she wants to see me sparingly. She’s even saying maybe we should slow down because she is not ready for what I’m ready for. Where do I go from here? I’m lost at what my next plan of action should be. I’m going to win her heart!
-Mr. I’m In Love
***Mr. I’m In Love, the heart is a fragile thing. If you break it too badly it might never recover. Obviously your lady is heartbroken, as a matter of fact she is dealing with an obliterated heart. I like to think of this as a state of crisis within a person when you’re so very broken and emotionally vulnerable. She is wise to pull back from you as another emotional blow at this time could push her towards a breakdown or worst! Just Google “Broken Heart Syndrome,” AKA stress cardiomyopathy! In turn, you should slow down too. If she’s the one, and it is meant to be, then it will work itself out. Your plans of action now should be inaction and reaction. Let her set the pace and tone of your relationship. Trust me when I tell you that traversing the shattered pieces of an obliterated heart is the most difficult task in the universe. Any man who takes on this task will have to be guided by patience, garbed with love, and entrusted by God. Good luck!
☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email at HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡