This is an advice column featured on Kontrol Magazine called “Hey Miss Carter” that answers dating, sex, and relationship questions! I received a question from a guy about the child’s mother claiming that she is the mother and father in their child’s life. I found this to be appropriate since Father’s Day was celebrated on yesterday!
Mr. Baby Daddy: Hey Miss Carter! I am writing in because my child’s mother is tripping. We conceived a child together recklessly and we were never in a relationship. Soon after she found out she was pregnant with my child she wanted to be with me and start a family. I was not interested in that and was upfront with her about it. I feel like we can co parent without being together. Now I have been there for my child as much as she will allow. She does not like that I have a girlfriend, so she manipulates things to keep me from my son. I love my child with all my heart and I try to get him as much as possible. Now Father’s Day was yesterday and she was posting pictures and collages like she’s the only parent involved and making it appear that I am a dead beat dad. Did I mention SHE is the reason I don’t get my son as much?! I’m pissed because I am there for my child as much as she allows! ALL of the drama is because I don’t want her! Come on Miss Carter, help me out!
Miss Carter: Hey Mr. BD! Let me be one to tell you Happy Father’s Day! Now this problem is all too common for bitter and heartbroken women. They try to manipulate the situation since the father of their children does not want a relationship with them and only the child. That is your choice as to whether or not you want to be with her. The fact that she is handling the situation like this shows that she is being very immature. A woman cannot be a father to a child. It is not set up in our DNA! Now some women do try to compensate for the lack of a father in a child’s life when that father does not choose to be involved; however your child’s mother is only hurting the child by keeping you away from your son. And to try to blast you on social media is just an attempt to get a reaction out of you. I’m willing to bet money that the story line would be very much so different if you decided to be with her. Sad truth but it is the truth. Women lose sight of the bigger picture when feelings and emotions get involved! That is your child and you have a right to be a father to your child without being a man to that child’s mother. Just a piece of advice that many guys don’t want to hear, it may be time for you to get a legal visitation schedule. This way it is court appointed and something that she has to respect. Don’t let this discourage you from being the best father you know how to be to your son. At the end of the day, your son will remember all the good times and things that you taught him as long as you are consistent and willing! Yes she might be praising herself for likes but you will shine in your son’s eyes and in this case his opinion is all that matters!