“The Book Of John Gray” Media Dinner In Atlanta

The beauty of our show is that it has a real human touch.

I had the pleasure of attending the media dinner in Atlanta with Pastor John Gray and his wife Aventer, the stars of OWN TV’s “The Book of John Gray.” He and his wife are back with a second season of ministering to people who are in need of encouragement and teaching people to do the hard work with love.

John Gray is the Senior Pastor of Relentless Church in Greenville, SC while also serving as an Associate Teaching Pastor at Joel Osteen’s world-famous Lakewood Church.

Aventer and John Gray/Credit: Connie Irvin

This season, John works with reality star Tami Roman in the premiere episode to shed the false image and persona that chronically plagues her across social media. John and Aventer create their non-profit organization Become the Bridge (BTB) to help aid Hurricane Harvey victims with the help from Michelle Williams. As the season progresses, John helps a woman through her grieving process after the death of her identical twin sister and counsels a military veteran deal with effects of PTSD. He also works on relationship counseling with actress LeToya Luckett which comes full circle as she gets married and asks John and Aventer to play a huge part in her special day.

I want people to look at the show and see what me and Aventer do and know they can do the same thing in their own way.

Back in January, singer Ciara posted a clip of Pastor Gray on her Instagram explaining that if women want to be married, they have to stop acting like a girlfriend and act like a wife. I had to ask him what he meant my having the spirit of a girlfriend and if he preaches the message of having the spirit of a boyfriend to men. His full quote:

“The challenge with social is that it never tells the full story. That was a 53 second clip of a 45 minute message and the message was geared towards Christian women who were voluntarily at a conference. I was speaking from a biblical perspective of what the bible says is the role of a wife, the favor the comes with being a wife. I juxtaposed what the bible says about the favor that comes with being a wife versus the contemporary society that says it’s ok for a Christian woman to just be a girlfriend.

This is not a blanket statement for all women, it is not a blanket statement to people who are not believers.

That’s very important because that draws a distinction between people who say who do you think you are telling me…I wasn’t speaking to you. I was speaking to Christian women who have a biblical view on God’s take on femininity and relationships; some of them want to be wives. The presupposition is that if you want to be a wife, there’s a certain posture and a certain behavior that goes with that.

To answer your question, I have spoken and continue to speak to men about their role and their responsibilities. And I speak about the fact, when Adam was going from single to married, God said it’s not good for him to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him. He put him to sleep, took a rib, closed his flesh and when he awoke Eve was there. I speak to men and tell them if you’re serious about going to get a wife, ask the Lord to close your flesh.”

I don’t like the term “relationship goals.” It bothers me.

Speaking of marriages, Aventer Gray expressed to us that she doesn’t like the term relationship goals because you don’t know what a couple is going through. Aventer explained that couples only show the good parts and people need to know about the stumbling blocks. Her and John have had their own stumbling blocks. At one point in their marriage, the Gray’s didn’t know if they were going to survive the hard times but here they are still pressing on and encouraging others from a space of experience and truth.

Aventer and John Gray/Credit: Connie Irvin

Pastor Gray ended the dinner with a mini sermon that you can view here.  You can catch “The Book of John Gray” Saturday’s 10p.m. ET/PT on OWN TV. Watch the trailer below.